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We’re in tough times right now.
Two of my three daughters were laid off last Friday.
After a well-worded inquiry, my oldest daughter avoided a lay off and transitioned to a new role in her company. Manager of the 3rd shift disinfecting team.
My mother is in the late stages of Alzheimer’s, and inaccessible in her board and care. The good news is that she doesn’t know what’s going on. The bad news is that I may have held her hand for the last time.
My 84-year-old father is in isolation in his apartment. I talk to him daily now—that’s a new thing—but only see him once a week to deliver his groceries.
My corporate clients are focused—rightfully so—on the critical issue of how to survive given the coronavirus. As a self-employed business leadership consultant, I’m not generating any income.
Tough times are, by definition, tough. They’re hard. It’s painful. It sucks while we’re in the middle of it.
In the long run, though, we’ll get through this.
We’re America. That’s what we do. We use tough times to become better as individuals and as a nation. I trust our nation. I trust our style of government.
Most of all, I trust the American people. I trust you.
We’ll use our strength, our grit, our determination and our ingenuity. We won’t just get through this crisis. We’ll get better from it.
When we’re under stress, we revert back to our habit patterns. That’s why our military trains so hard—to develop habit patterns. When the bullets are flying, we go back to our training—our habits.
That’s why character is so important. Character is really the accumulation of all your habit patterns.
These tough times are an opportunity to get better at life through better thinking and better habit patterns.
When things are good, we tend to coast through life without thinking much. That’s natural. When things are going well, why reflect much on things?
Tough times force us to stop. To think. Why are things bad? What’s not working?
Deeper, what is important in life that we need to prioritize? What isn’t that important that we can drop?
Tough times get us to reflect on the meaning of life, on where we’re headed and why.
Tough times are also an opportunity to strengthen our habit patterns to develop the character needed to tackle adversity and take advantage of opportunity.
When we combine good thinking and good habits, we develop wisdom. Wisdom is the knowledge about life that makes us Happier and more successful in life.
More specifically, wisdom is the combination of knowledge and character. When you know the truth—that’s the thinking part—and live the truth—that’s the habit and character part—you develop wisdom.
If you seek wisdom, when tough times hit again, you’ll know what needs to be done, and you’ll have the courage and discipline to get it done.
Tough times are an opportunity to develop the wisdom we need to be Happier and more successful in all aspects of life—at work and with our families.
So, what do we need to think about? What truth do we need to know about life?
We get so caught up in life that its easy to lose sight of what’s really important.
When I ask people what life is about, or ask about meaning or purpose in life, most people don’t know what to say. We don’t talk about it.
We spend all this time and energy and our lives doing things without knowing why.
Younger people have been told to chase a whole list of things in life—from competing for the right schools and sports teams to getting the perfect job and solving all the world’s problems—and then they often get burned and lose trust in the system. That’s unfair to them
What is life all about? How do we know what’s important and not?
It’s simple. Life is about Happiness. Fulfillment.
Where do we find Happiness? How can we get it?
According to an 80-year, ongoing Harvard Study on Adult Development, happiness comes from high quality relationships. You won’t just be happier. You’ll be healthier and live longer.
What do we need to do to have great relationships?
It’s simple again. Great relationships are high-trust relationships.
There are three virtues that build great, high-trust, high-performance relationships:
- Seek Wisdom: The more people trust your knowledge—about your work and life—and the more they trust your character, the better your relationship.
- Practice Love: We all have people who’ve made huge impacts in our lives—usually because they took the time to love and care about us. The more people know that you love them, the stronger your relationships.
- Get Results: The more people know that you’ll make the shot, close the deal, finish the project, be there for them in tough times—the better your relationship.
So, let’s take these tough times as an opportunity to get back to the basics of life.
To filter out all the distractions in life and get back to what really matters.
Happiness. Fulfillment. Great relationships.
Let’s seek wisdom, practice love and get results. That will give us the knowledge, character and relationships that lead to Happiness and success in life.
Finally, let’s remember that we’re America. Our strength comes from our unity around a shared understanding of life combined with the diversity of our individual talents and experiences.
We’re facing a great test. Let’s become better people and a better America by meeting this challenge together.
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Michael Ferachi On March 23, 2020 at 10:33 pm
Pete, your wise words could not have been timed any better!